Tuesday, April 22, 2008


I'm angry with someone.
That someone asked me for forgiveness.

Forgiving isn't the hard part for me. In fact, something about forgiveness comes natural to me and I am deeply grateful to God for that. But then there is this one little problem......... my mind works and it remembers e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g.....with 99.9% accuracy.

I don't believe in bringing up old issues....whether it is my friends, my parents, my spouse, co-worker...whatever. If it has been forgiven, then I need to never bring it up again, and true, I would appreicate the same. But doesn't that "old" wound tend to direct your next move in some situations? Aren't I likely to withhold some of myself, if someone previously damaged a part of my self?

Moving forward with someone who leaves a scar is so complicated. Choosing forgiveness is right but can leave you vulnerable. I'm working on this. I'd like to trust that my forgiveness will be respected and that my heart will be protected.

Even after writing this, I'm not really angry. Just hurt. Hurt is more than enough. We just have to learn not to put our faith and trust in people. God is the only One who cannot let us down. His is the only perfect love. And we should forgive our human counterparts because we have received the gift of forgiveness. Grace. Pay it forward.

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