Tuesday, September 30, 2008

I'm Not as Think as you Drunk I am....no really

Ok, so today was good and good and not so good.


Day started with me snoozing an extra 15 minutes, which if you know you math, you'll know that this is only a 2 hour and 45 minute shortage of sleep, rather than 3 hours short.... it's math...and it's okay if you don't get it.


Then, my man took the kids to school while I went to the barn and watched Pam ride Moreau who's leg is healing. You don't have to follow me, because I know what I'm talking about.


Then I get a call that we are going to have a showing tonight after our house has barely been on the market one day. You cannot imagine my ecstaticism....is that a word? If not, it should be.


I cleaned house for 3 hours to transform it into a museum...really, phenomenal, beautificatory (which also should be a word). Lovely, simply sweet. It's a late showing which means the chef man cannot cook so we had to go out to dinner with the kiddos which we cannot currently afford to do, even if it is cheap mexican food. We get the call on the way there that the showing is cancelled. Inser 15 4-letter words right here. Are there 15? I can only really think of 4. But we have to go out to dinner now because the kids are PSYCHED, PUMPED, ECSTATICITED (another word I just made up)....and leave it not to me to break my kids hearts.


I ordered a large frozen strawberry margarita...before understanding what that meant. Take a gigantic look at this.



It's poor quality photo from my phone, but let me tell you this beverage lacked not a darn thing in quality. I'm not a big drinker...although you certainly cannot tell that from this photo.....but here's the really crazy part (get ready, Christian girl goes whack).......I cleaned out Asher's milk cup (to go) right at the table and poured the remaining margarita in that cup, stuffed it in my purse, and walked out. Don't worry, Shawn drove....wait, no, Joe drove home I am quite certain. Fairly positively sure that I occupied the passenger seat with a frozen strawberry margafrigginrita in my purse. Don't worry, I remembered the straw. Oh and if you think that large mega thing is just the angle of the camera, think again....it is literally bigger than Joe's head.

Did I mention that my house looks like a museum?

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Ok, Get Your 5 Frogs Ready!

Oh, with such great passion he sings, and with striking tonality....

Ladies and Gentelmen, I present to you....... A.s.h.e.r. T.a.t.e

video

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

She Trusted Me With Prayer

There are evidences of time passing that brighten any darkness lurking in my heart. I love to witness with my eyes and nose, the birth of spring, year after year. I enjoy getting older....actually. The further I grow from the years that wrecked my soul, the more settled my soul becomes....so age heals me. I have plants in my garden that change in the autumn to such rich, deep, heavy colors, so opposite from the light and fluffiness of their spring coat. Evidence of time passing has some benefits, for me. The older my children get, the more a part of my history they are. The longer a friendship grows, the more a friend feels like family....the more a friend begins to feel like a finger or a toe (attached and necessary).

Time hurts when the clock is ticking away from the passing of a loved one. My aunt Brenda died on September 25, 2002. 6 years ago. Her absence is painful at every family gathering, every holiday, and for me....every time the seasons change. She loved seasons. I love seasons. She is missed every time I eat a casserole or a pie. She is missed every time I hear the word "cancer".

She battled a variety of cancers for a long period of time....always seeming to rebound. Then it got bad and she needed some surgeries. Then it didn't get better. She lost a lot of weight in a short period of time. I went to visit her a couple of times in Kentucky the last year of her young life. We talked about things that we pretended were no big deal, but they were a really big deal and I knew in my heart she was preparing for death, even before she understood that death was close. The last time I saw her, it was my privilege to go to Kentucky and spend the night with her in the hospital as many of us were taking turns so that her husband could go back to work. The night I was there was the night before the doctors were to decide if more surgery would help. We watched "Friends" on the hospital room TV and then James Taylor played on Letterman or Leno.... I can hear her like it was yesterday........she was thorougly enjoying James Taylor and showing it in her typcial goofy rock chic kinda way. When she snapped to music, she would gnarl up her lip and smile/laugh, pretend to sing.....and do a silly little head-bang to the beat. I remember laying on the little bed I was sleeping on with my heart beating fast and taking her in.

The next day, I was the only one in the room with my aunt Brenda when the doctor walked in and told her non-chalantly that she would die in about 30 days, that she would die of starvation because her body could not digest food. I remember feeling like (A) I was the wrong person to be in the room because that news should have been delivered to her husband or to her son. (B) that damn doctor must be lying.... (C) what the hell do I do now? The doctor left (of course) and I crawled on the bed with my aunt Brenda and held her hand. We cried. I don't know how long I was there or all that took place, but I remember her asking me to pray with her, for her. She was scared, and in her fear she deemed me qualified. That has always stuck with me. I was not a seasoned pray-er at that time. I was really only seasoned at existing......but my love for Christ was fresh and fierce. I remember praying for peace for her spirit and for her total forgiveness. She wasn't totally sold that she had been fully forgiven, but she wanted to believe that. I might have helped that day. I hope I did. I hugged her and kissed her and stayed until her husband came. That was my cue to leave.... not a moment that I needed to interrupt. I walked out the hospital room, quietly shut the door, and left my trail of tears from there to my car, and all the way back to Nashville. I knew I would never see her again.

I hope she's doing her goofy rock chic routine while she's in Heaven. I'm quite sure God is getting a kick outta that. I think I'm going to make a casserole......and a pie.

Monday, September 22, 2008

It's all about the BUTT

Ok, so I recently learned this trick about tracking how many people are visiting my blog, etc. No, I have no idea who you are if you do not leave a comment or flat out tell me, but I know where my referrals come from and how many people visit on a given day. It shocks me actually to see that I am visited by 9 countries...and I'm going to admit that one of them I have never even heard of. But here is why I write today......because I really need a good laugh.....but there is a way for me to research and see what "search terms" people are using, and then randomly end up on my web log.

You would not be surprised to learn that many people are researching jasper, heaven, jasper in heaven, and even just my name, etc. Many of the search terms make perfect sense. But here are the ones that have me cracking up! These are exact search terms people used and somehow ended up with my blog as an option, all of this is from Google. Get ready...

1. little boys butts
2. bam smash boom
3. being near someone makes your heart race
4. cute butts with underwear
5. round little butts
6. fleas on walls?
7. toddler prayer

Someone please tell me.....why do I attract people looking for cute little butts?

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Words

I have had upmteen missed blog post opportunities over the past week or so. My heart has been heavy and my mind has been too busy to sleep. At times over the past few weeks I have felt like I am suffocating. I could blog, or I could not. I guess I chose "not". I'm sorry, and I'm not.

***

Business has been rough. I have two closings next week, but both of them have been plagued in a sense with negative factors. I have worked long and hard. I have had to deliver bad news. In one case, I have even been driven to argue, which is not my preferred method of managing a transaction. Due to the economy mostly, I am seeing people freak out and behave in ways that probably aren't typical. It is upsetting to everybody. When all is said and done next week, both sets of my clients will be better off, and will be happy, but it has been so difficult.

***

To combat the negative economic forces, we in our family are making some changes. In my opinion for my situation, these are huge changes and they carry with them some fear and a little grief. To start.....you might remember me posting a blog not long ago about the little economy rental car that I had to drive for 5 weeks while my big handsome luxury vehicle was being repaired. Well, I did it. I traded away my large leather interior, with 6 CD's, dual climate control, 6 cylinder all-wheel-drive and more, for a small 4-cylinder, simple, car. The idea is not only to save on gas, but just to move toward a more simplistic lifestyle in general. I desire the simplicity for 2 reasons. #1 is most definitely because I know I have always had a material mind because I have almost never had material luxuries....and I was in the overcrowded rat race. At this point in my life, my heart wants whatever God wants for me, and I believe with all my heart that He wants simplicity for me. I have certainly endured some pain over this. But the truth of the bottom line is that there is no material possession that can possibly bring happiness into my life. Not one. Knowing this is a freedom that I never thought I would feel. Not caring about wealth and not caring about possessions is like having cuffs removed. I'm not chained, and I love it. My heart belongs to Jesus. His desire is for me to be in this world, but not of this world...that I will serve for Him. I cannot do that if I am concerned about what I drive and where I live. Today I drive a humble, simple, solid car. #2 is to instill a sense of peace in my younger children as they grow up that we are not living this life to compete for stuff. Relationships matter far more than any bank accounts and service to others matters far more than focusing on what the world can do for "me". I hope we are starting to set a good example for them.
The second change we are making is with our home. We are going to sell our home and find or build something smaller and less expensive. I'm full on board with the motto that "less is more". We're not there yet, but I highly anticipate the feeling of renewal and cleanliness in my soul when we have accomplished this, by the grace of God.

***

Two matieral things I have treasured the most broke at the same time. First my car and then my beautiful diamond ring (the band broke). Both have taken over a month to repair, and in that time, I have learned that not only can I live without both, but that I should. I'll get my ring back next week. I want to sell it. God has an amazing gift for convicting me.

***

I had to drive a lot this week. I'm blessed to live in such a beautiful area, that no matter where I go...when I leave and when I return, my eyes get to see such beauty in trees, flowers, sky, birds, hills, bluffs and rivers. God's gorgeous creation is all around me. One day this week I drove down a road that was framed in trees that hung above the street at touched at the top like a canopy. I felt the presence of Jesus in the trees. He was sitting in the branches eating fruit and singing worship songs and He engaged with me. He wanted me to know and wants you to know that there is peace. Maybe we need to explore nature more to feel it. Maybe we need to sit still and feel the breeze. Maybe we need to elevate love to the top of our priority list. Jesus reminded me in that moment that Heaven will offer us far more than this world ever could. I'm content to live here to glorify Him, and then enjoy Heaven to the fullest.

***

Do you have a friend that brings you constant heartache? Get rid of her or him. You can love and forgive and still distance yourself from the center of pain. Don't compromise who you are or who you can be because you feel the need to please someone else who serves themself. Escape. There is peace.

***

It is scary when there is no gasoline, and when the market crashes, and when hurricanes destroy and when politicians make promises.

***

I have started about 10 projects in my house over the past couple of months and finished all but one. That one will get finished this weekend.

***

I have cursed a lot the past couple of weeks. I'm sorry.

***

My mom, my husband and my 3 sons were all sitting at my dinner table last night. That is happiness.

***

I have a friend and business associate who has breast cancer. Praying for her hurts.

***

I love my friends. My real friends. I wasted a lot of years misunderstanding friendships, being abused, and making more than my fair share of mistakes. My current account of friendships has me rich beyond measure.

***

Come back soon to see the most precious video of Asher singing a wonderful song. I'll post it this week.

***

Love

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Shawn is learning Sign Language

As mentioned in a previous post, Shawn has been learning the sign language for the word "more". It's a great starting point. Shawn just started going to speach therapy once a week, and sign language is practiced in the classroom as needed. So, in this video, you will see Shawn do the sign for "more" at least twice. We were in the kitchen last night playing with a toy that he loves, a spinning toy. When it stops, he began signing "more" without being prompted. It is such a blessing that his mind is making the proper connections. We think more signs are on the way, and we'll continue to show you his progress. Oh, and FYI....Shawn is almost 21 months old and does not speak. He is loud and vocal (trust me on this), but no clear words.

OK, so the sign for more requires both hands. If you bunch up your fingers and thumb on each hand, and tap them together, you get "more"......here, Shawn will show you. Enjoy.


video

Saturday, September 13, 2008

I've Been Tagged

Ok, so I was just casually minding my own business over on my friend's blog, when I realized she tagged me.....DANG......and so here I am just trying to follow the rules. And here are those rules:

1. Post the rules
2. List 6 random things about yourself
3. Tag 6 others
4. If you get tagged....just do it

Here is me playing nice:

1. I have 3 tattoos

2. I hate mayo in ANYTHING

3. I do not like to be tagged if I'm going to have any responsibilities.

4. This month is mine and Joe's 7th wedding anniversary (woo hoo)

5. I painted my toe-nails light pink at the beginning of this summer.....and well, all the pink is almost grown off now......just in time for autumn.

6. I hold licenses in financial management, skincare, and real estate, because I am a knowledge junkie.


Ok, now I'm going to pretend to tag other people. I'm a rebel that way.

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Man Accessories

Shawn has discovered tennis shoes and ball caps.







And as always, Asher is the ultimate accessory.





Friday, September 5, 2008

Reward

I receieved a card in the mail this week, with a donation for my missions trip fundraising. The card was from a friend I went to highschool with, but have only seen once in the past 20 years (at our 10 year reunion). We barely know each other, really..... the money she sent is greatly appreciated, however, it is the card that she chose that is really blowing me over. It is a quote by John Ruskin...

"The highest reward for a person's toil is not what they get for it, but what they
become by it."



I'm blogging about missions here. Please join me.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

I Am a Swing Voter

I always have been a swing voter, and I never like that about myself. Or I love it. There are times I wish I had the thing inside me that people must have, to grab onto a political party and stand strong in support of that party until their dying day. But instead, there is this thing inside me that wants to weed out the truth from the lies, tally up the good marks, and cast my vote. But even deeper still, there is this confusion over what is truth and what is lie. In recent elections, I think I have found myself voting against one candidate, moreso than truly voting FOR the other.

I will tell you, this election is no different. I'm worried about the leadership in our country. I am nervous. It is my right and my responsibility to vote, and I will. But I might be on my knees in that ballot box just praying God will let me press the right buttons. But what are the right buttons? This is the THING I have thought about for 10 years now........(please follow along if you can)..... I believe with all of my heart, that God has the plan for our worlds leaders. I truly and deeply in my soul believe that the right person (according to God's plan) will be elected president And I also truly and deeply believe that the "right" person, might very well be the "wrong" person. Why? Because I read and study the bible, and if you're familiar......it doesn't end in world peace because of "us". It ends in Heaven because of Jesus, and folks, the picture between now and then is not too pretty. It's bathed in war, crime, and people turning their backs on God. It is horrific, most especially for people who do not believe. I believe in God's will.....and I believe, as with my own personal life, He will allow us to suffer periods of terrible failure and pain, to get our attention. I believe this is true for the individual, the group, the organization, and for the nation.

Who is responsible for our leadership? WE ARE! We put them in office. Who created the laws? We did. Who's policies allow for majority and delegates to not always be the same? Uh.....US. Who voted for Gore but elected Bush? Ummmm.....the Americans. God gives us a mind to think with and a heart and a soul for the rest of what makes us who we are. When we lose sight of God, we make decisions that He might not have made. We choose paths He might not have blessed. We engage in ideals that might not represent Him. So we, break it down, break it down, break it down.....and collectively, we run our lives, our businesses, schools and our government, largely without God. And He allows us these failures. If we do not fail and do not suffer, we might not recognize how much we need a savior.

I don't think it is exciting when a new President is elected. It freaks me out a little. America will get what America wants, based on the voting system (delegates, majority, whatever). Some people will vote in support of their firm association with a political party. Some people will vote based on one single issue.......it might be pro-choice vs. pro-life. Some people, sad but true, will vote against a race or for a race (for the first time in history of the Presidential election). Now, some might vote for or against a gender issue, because of Ms. Palin. Some will oddly vote for the candidate they are most physically attracted to (and you KNOW this is true!). I wonder how many people will just pray to be led between now and election date, to the core truths of the candidates and their plans, and actually weigh out the differences, and even ask God to give us a leader who will make only a few small mistakes for a long time? I wonder who will pray that our next elected leaders be a blessing to the nation and to the world.

I'm still swinging. I am feeling no convictions one way or the other. I did listen to Ms. Palin speak at the convention last night and I was riveted. I believe regardless of the results of the election, that that woman has something incredibly special inside of her. This moment I admire her, for her willingness to air the dirty laundry, and to fiercly seek change in support of what she believes.

I will be praying, sincerely, for our nation to seek God more than seek a President, and then maybe God will allow us a good one. I'm swingin' and prayin'.

Monday, September 1, 2008

My Knight

HI. This is a video, people. You will need to press the play arrow, if you care to be entertained.

video