Saturday, July 24, 2010

Spirit Invasion

I do have updates on my Zim fundraising. My old friend B gave me $200. My friends S&B gave me $370 toward my expenses and $200 toward a computer for Fatima. S gave me $100. P gave me $50. D&B gave me $150 I received payment this week for a few hours of consulting I did for $100. So yes, my fundraising is making progress and I am SO thankful. To date, I have received $1,990 toward my expenses. AND, I have already purchased the netbook computer for Fatima!!! Praise God!

My airfare is $2,800+, $350 for lodging, $30 for the visa. I'm not sure how much my food will cost. I will not be taking any excursions or side trips.

I would love to raise the additional $900 for my airfare. As I have mentioned before, I am prepared to spend $1,000 of my own money.

The countdown is on. I will board a plane to fly to Zim, in 11 days. My initial excitement is geared toward seeing the faces of the kids and hugging them! I also cannot wait to hear them sing and dance. They always perform for me and it is amazing, beyond words to describe. They project such loud and clear voices, with amazing harmonies and rhythm. They sing in their native Shona tongue. Lovejoy plays the conga drum, and they all dance. I will sit and stare at them with tears running down my face and a plastered smile incapable of being broken. Boaz will lead the troop in their performance. He can captivate any audience all by himself. That boy can dance like nobody's business. And his smile is off the charts.

I cannot wait to see Sarah. The story of her past abandonment is just so devastating. No matter what, any child losing their family to the ravages of Aids is horrifying. But for some reason, when I picture Sarah in the brush, unable to find love from her grandparents.....running from wild baboons, I sink a little inside myself. A little girl running scared, in search of someone to save her....just rings a little differently than a boy. I believe that every child who made their way to Fatima was surrounded by heavenly angels.

Boaz carried his little sister a very long distance to a doctor and watched her die. No one cared enough about her to help Boaz transport her. So he picked her up and walked for miles and miles.

Keldon lost his parents and his twin brother to Aids.

Some of the kids have been too reserved to share their stories with me, but I deeply hope and pray that after several days with me this time, I will know them all. I want to know Emily better. Emily is stunning and shy. Her little voice is so sweet. I want to hear her story. Precious has a wild, gorgeous afro. Her smile covers her entire face. She says she loves me like a mother. I want to know her story. These young ladies are strong. They are so strong.

They are so intrigued by my life. No, not my American life, but my life as a "mum". They want to know about my children. They like to ask me questions about how I love them and how I relate to them. They ask me very hard questions and I give them very honest answers. I can't help but wonder if they are seeking a glimpse of how their mothers would love them if only their mothers were still here. They look for my joy and they imagine hers. They look for my love and they find hers. I'm not sure....but that is how it seems to me.

If you are a mom and if you have ever wondered what your children would do without you....well, they would look for you in the face and hearts of others.

I have worked myself into tears this morning. I want to do everything in God's plan for me to do while I am in Zim. I want to share every word He would prepare and I want to comfort anyone who needs it. I want to be prepared for laughter and for tears. He is sending me as a minister and a messenger. He expects me to allow them to explore and He requires me to be real. It's harder than you might think. Sometimes they lead me to drudge up things I'd rather forget. They are teenagers and that is what teenagers do. They are facing a very difficult life of independence in Zim. Their challenges are hardly even imaginable to our American minds. I am weak and unworthy of this opportunity. Please pray for a mighty spirit invasion into my heart.

1 comment:

Sarah said...

This time around,I had decided I couldn't afford to donate anything. But this morning in my Bible study I read about David rejoicing as he and his people donated gold, silver, timber, iron, and brass for the building of God's house. He rejoiced that they were able to give, because he said they were only giving back to God what had come from his hand.

When I read that, I told God I want to be more generous because he HAS blessed me so much.

So when I read your entry today, I knew He wanted me to give. I made a small donation out of the blessings from God's hand.

Just as David couldn't build the temple himself, I can't go with you to Zimbabwe, but I believe God is going to bless your trip mightily through the provision that is passing from His hand to you through the hands of others.